What to Say to Someone Who Ghosted You
Ghosting can feel like a breakup, here’s how you can react to it.
Imagine getting to know someone and after a few dates and late-night talks, BOOM –they disappear without a trace. Did this person lose your number? Get amnesia? Kidnapped by aliens? Or just…simply left and came back like nothing happened? There’s a term for this, called ghosting. This kind of rejection leaves you wondering, “why or how did this even happen?” Here are some tips to guide you when someone ghosts you.
Thanks, but no thanks.
You can take the blunt route if you feel this would help you move pass the rejection of being ghosted. In this scenario, your goal would be to say something that lets him or her know that you are no longer interested.
“I don’t have the patience to be on and off with someone.”
“I’m not interested in being involved with someone leading me on.”
“Please do not ever call me again.”
“I’m in a committed relationship now since you’ve disappeared on me.”
“Do me a favor, don’t call me again.”
“Thanks for clearing that up, I have to go.”
“I’m not interested in doing this with you anymore.”
“I really liked you and you started ignoring my calls and texts like I didn’t mean anything to you. Starting over is too much for me.”
“I’ve been trying to reach out to you for the past two weeks and haven’t heard anything back. It would’ve been settling to formally end things, but I guess you don’t want that.”
“Let’s make this the last time we carry a conversation.”
“Sorry, I just don’t allow people to be in and out of my life.”
Move on like it never happened.
You can take the “say nothing” approach. If it was short lived and you feel like you haven’t gained or lost anything from the experience, then give yourself some time to get over this rejection and move pass it. This one situation is no indication of how people will treat you in the future. This can be considered the “mature” route if you feel the way you can win this is by showing how much you don’t care about that person. It takes a lot of mental strength to be able to avoid someone you once felt close to. Beat ‘em at their own game! The only drawback to doing this is if you do have feelings toward that person, you may not ever get to share how you truly felt.
How to take their Explanation
Often times, after a person has ghosted you, they may try to reach out in the near future. If he or she reaches out to you out of the blue, then you are owed an explanation.
Here are some classy clapbacks to respond with:
Ghost: “I’ve been busy”
You: “Me too, but I still had time to respond to your message”
Ghost: “I have a lot going on”
You: “So does Beyonce but you don’t hear her complaining”
Ghost: “I’m confused about my feelings”
You: “I’m confused as to why you just couldn’t say that”
Ghost: “I got cold feet”
You: “I didn’t know ghost had feet”
Ghost: “I had another situationship going on”
You: “Too bad. This ship has already sailed away”
Ghost: “Sorry I ran out on you like that”
You: “The only time I don’t mind being ghosted is on Halloween”
Ghost: “My phone was broken, I didn’t know how to reach you”
You: “Ever heard of a pigeon carrier?”
Either response you take should be thought through with consideration of your feelings, not the person who disappeared from you. If you decide to move forward with keeping in contact with this person, the key is to make sure that there is a better understanding of how consistent you want the communication to go both ways!